a sample dropdownlist
<asp:dropdownlist id="ddl" runat="server">
<asp:listitem text="a" value="0" />
<asp:listitem text="c" value="1" />
<asp:listitem text="z" value="2" />
</asp:dropdownlist>
now if you want to choose an item based on an event let us have button click as an example
<asp:button id="btnclick" runat="server" Text="click" />
now in the jquery part you have to do like this
1: <script type="text/javascript">
2: $('#<%=btnclick.ClientId%>').click(function(){
3:
4: $("#<%=ddl.ClientId %> option[text='c' ] ").attr("selected","selected");
5: //for selecting based on value
6: $("#<%=ddl.ClientId %> option[value='1' ] ").attr("selected","selected");
7: //or
8: $("#<%=ddl.ClientId %>").val('0').attr("selected","selected");
9:
10: });
11: </script>